Do you?

I wonder if you comprehend

the way my world closes in

when the air gets to thick to breathe,

when the colors dull

and the room spins.



I wonder if you understand

the way my muscles clinch

when I feel too large for the world,

when the voice speaks

and I believe.



I wonder if you see

the way my nails dig through my flesh

when my thoughts are fogged

when panic fills my chest,

and my body shakes.



I wonder if you know

the way I dream of never being

when I look into the mirror,

when I see my thighs

or my swollen cheaks.